What If It Were You

Today I am back from a great vacation that was good to have. It was full of everything you would expect and all of the other things that life throws at us as well. We made a trip to Gettysburg, Pennsylvania to visit the historical battlefield from the U.S. Civil War. Other locations were visited as well, we passed the Blacksburg, Virginia site of the horrible shootings and other many things observed and enjoyed.

I also had the unfortunate opportunity to witness a head-on accident between a car and motorcycle. Myself and a few others got out, called emergency officials and assisted in any way that we could. I can not tell you if the motorcyclist survived his injuries. From what I observed, he would have been quite lucky if he did. My prayers and thoughts go out to him and his family as well as those also involved in the accident.

It surprised me observing all of this how many people simply left the scene. Many apparently not wanting to get involved, too busy to be concerned with the event that occurred. I direct this last statement to those that were direct witness to the accident. As busy as our lives are, we still need to have concern for our fellow human. It makes me wonder if these are the type of people one could depend upon for anything.

Life is taken away from us in many unexpected ways. It is something that a large majority of us have no control over. Yet for the living, how we respond to the death of another says much about our own character. A small level of compassion can go such a long way in the comforting of those that remain. As I have heard said, "prayers are for the deceased, sympathy is for the living."

Take a moment to think about how you might respond in an emergency. Even though it is tough to know exactly what that is, try to. Doing so now could make a difference in a real situation. As I would hope, if I were in need, out there are people willing to care and take action. Be a person of action to help others.

The Power Of Giving

We must remember that everything we enjoy now has come from the efforts of those before us. Even electricity and cars have come about from the efforts of men over a hundred years ago. Often times, people want instant results for what they do. This is not bad in and of itself, however, we must also remember the impact we are having on the future, and that future will be lived by our children, and the children of our children.

At the ripe old age of eighty years, Joe was a happy go get em kind of guy. He had worked hard his entire life to provide for his family in every way he possibly could and had enjoyed his retirement years by tending to his garden and the twenty two acres of land he owned. One day while planting apple trees on a couple acres of the land he owned, one of his neighbors came by and asked him if what he was doing.

"Planting apple trees," Joe replied.

"By surely you realize that it takes 8 to 10 years for those trees to bear fruit. You will most likely never live to taste those apples, so whats the point?" The neighbor asked.

"Well," Joe said, "I have may not ever taste a single apple from any of the trees I plant, however, if old men of the past had thought the same thing, I may never have had the pleasure of tasting the sweet necture of apples in the past. I only wish to give the same in return for people in the future."

The moral of the story, build those things you want to create in the world for the beauty of the fact that it will help others live happier more fulfilling lives. Even if that means you never truly get to experience the fruits of your labor. Surely Henry Ford wasn't worried about what the auto industry would become after he died. Of course he had a vision, but he built what his vision was any way regardless of what would happen to the auto industry in the future.

Be willing to put yourself on the line and build something magnificent. What you build may take years to build, but may be destroyed in a day. However, we all have a gift to give to the world, and we need to be willing to put ourselves out there at the risk of losing everything to share that gift with the world. Those who are givers are recievers, and we must always give first to get. More importantly, we must do our part by giving something to the world that leaves more in people and for people than it takes. What is twenty dollars for a book that completely changes ones life. What is ten dollars for a meal that keeps us alive. What is a small price for something that makes our lives so much more incredible and amazing.

Move Into Alternate Reality By Shifting Timelines

Quantum science tells us that there is not a flat line running from the past to the future. This is the view of most people, but it is based on the old science, and is no longer true. Einstein has proven that time is not fixed, it expands and it contracts. And, time has a vertical dimension. There are many "lanes of time" running simultaneously and you can change lanes. You can begin in one lane, then change lanes to produce a different outcome than you expected in the original lane. This means there are multiple possibilities existing simultaneously in any instant, subject to our conscious and intentional choice.

We have the power to direct our awareness through this field of creative intelligence scientists call the quantum hologram. And through powerful thought we can activate another vertical strand of time, one in which we are whole and well and already healed, because we never were sick. The same applies to every area of life, relationships, finances and success. Peak performance in every area of life is already a reality, in another thread of time. We have the power to activate any scenario in life that we want.

The quantum leap to a healthier you, a more abundant you, a more attractive you, a more successful you, a more youthful you, which exists in another thread of time, is possible only if you are able to break barriers of your current thinking. Your current thinking creates a prison that traps us in this linear reality of causation. When you imagine, you tap into an alternate possibility timeline where what you are imagining exists as reality. Having the feelings of experiencing that reality puts you into vibrational harmony with the frequency of that timeline. Your visualization selects one of the possible scenarios within that timeline to merge with your present timeline.

Linear time, the idea that our past is set and future yet to come, is all an illusion. Linear time is a product of our minds, a limited interpretation of the way time actually functions. It is not time that moves past us while we watch, but our consciousness which moves through various timelines and experiences. Everything physical, in all its manifestations and possibilities, has already been created and exists as a static hologram. What has not been created yet is the world path we freely take through these possibilities, which particular experiences we choose, and what paths we take in learning a particular lesson. All probable futures have been created, but which of those futures we choose to move into is open.

Changes to fluid elements in reality does not only mean changes to present reality, but shifts in an entire timeline, past and present. You do not have to concern yourself with causality, with "going back in time" and changing key events, but rather merging an alternate timeline or dimension with your current one, which is identical to pulling all of mankind on to that alternate timeline. Whether timelines are merged into yours, or whether you and mankind are pulled into the alternate timeline makes no difference, for both are the same concept. Changing your timeline is simply a matter of moving yourself and all connected to you spatially across timelines into another.

The basis of manifesting involves using one's mind to create or seek out an alternate timeline, an alternate possibility to the way things are now or will most likely go in short time. Present reality and that alternate reality must be made identical in order for manifested changes to materialize. You consciously grab hold of the present reality by focusing on this point in space and time, then construct or select an alternate reality by visualizing the subject of your manifestation. You empower that visualization with the feeling of presence gained from focusing upon the present reality, and then fully bind the two by seeing them as identical.

First, you must be fully conscious to manifest something, which means planting your mind firmly upon this point in space and time, becoming aware of the here and now. This channels your will and energy into the actual present reality within which you exist, rather than sloppily diffusing it across random dimensions and moments as is typical of daydreams or states of inattention. This energy will be used to bind present reality to the one you intend to manifest.

While maintaining this alertness of the present moment and location, visualize what it is you intend to manifest. This is also the state of mind you go into when you pray. This creates an alternate dimension, an assemblage of thoughtforms, a way of seeking out candidate timelines which match the intended manifestation. The best fitting timelines are automatically selected, ones that accommodate the freewill of everyone whose realities are coupled to yours.

Last, you need to merge your visualized dimension or candidate timeline with present reality. This is done by identifying both of them as being the same thing, by intending and believing that what you visualized is present reality. You use the feeling of full consciousness and awareness of the present reality to empower the visualized reality. They thus become bound together, and synchronicities arise to complete their merger. This process can be abbreviated by skipping the first step, and simply placing full focus and intent into the visualized reality. The purpose of the first step is just to get a feel for "actuality".

7 Self Help Tips To Improve Your Mental health

"How are you feeling?"

Many people will answer, "I'm fine." But inside they are really feeling confused, disappointed or frustrated.

Many of these feelings are due to holding on to outdated concepts from previous experiences that cause us to act in ways that do not validate our lives. Practicing the daily keyword activities listed below can help you enjoy the benefits of balanced mental health.

Sunday

Inspiration: Feed your creativity. Immerse yourself in gardening, painting, craftwork or drawing and enjoy the creativity you possess.

Result: Dedicating time to activities solely for their enjoyment reinforces your sense of worth and relieves stress.

Monday

Perception: Consciously listening to your thoughts. Visually challenge thoughts that are counterproductive by writing them on paper. Select your words carefully to clearly convey information. Speak kindly, but honestly with everyone.

Result: Honest communication begins with yourself. By bringing negative thoughts out of your mind and on to paper, you will able to release them.

Tuesday

Exhilaration: Experience the vitality of life. Give your body freedom of movement in dance, games like Twister or sports. Learn a new physical skill such as CPR or self defense. Organize a paint party with your friends.

Result: Group activities are one of the best ways to revitalize yourself and others. Eliminating movement restrictions on your body also helps resolve emotional and mental barriers.

Wednesday

Mediation: Take a neutral position. Volunteer and befriend a person who needs to be heard. Practice compassion and acceptance of the feelings of others. Detach from your perspective and simply focus on the facts of the situation without judgement.

Result: By releasing the need to be "right" and accepting things as they are, you send the signal of acceptance to your psyche, which helps you achieve better mental balance.

Thursday

Expansion: Enhancing the big picture. Take a project to the next level. Pass on your skills by teaching them to a young person. Help a friend move to a new home or study a new subject to improve your skills.

Result: Actively engaging in bringing about change shows us the positive side of transformation, strengthening our mental and emotional balance for when the unexpected occurs.

Friday

Enrichment: Counting your blessings. Write a list of everything you are grateful to have in your life. Extend assistance to an elderly person you know. Contribute books, music or other media to your local library or school.

Result: Sharing with others reinforces your own sense of security and trust in the unlimited abundance of life. This helps to alleviate anxiety and frustration.

Saturday

Determination: Perseverance and completion. Make the call and resolve an issue that is in limbo. Keep the promise you made to a friend months ago. Clean out the garage or the attic. Sit down with the person with whom you have a misunderstanding and clear the air.

Result: Living your personal truth is a cornerstone of good mental health and it takes courage. When you make a commitment and see it through to its conclusion, you demonstrate loyalty to your character.

Overcoming Stage Fright

Stage fright is just a nervous or anxious disorder based on anxiety. What it all comes down to is this...your body is telling you that you may fail so you get nervous. The problem is that it is your mind that is feeding this (garbage) condition to your body. You body reacts by pumping adrenaline. It is time to get both body and mind to SHUT UP!

Here are the steps to bringing body and mind in sync:


#1 Be on top of the material you are going to perform or present. Know your lines. Or have a good idea of the speech. Practice not only what the words are, but how you are going to say them.

#2 Speaking lines or doing a part is all rhythm. If you learn your lines or speech or words like a song (using pacing) you will not mess up. Because you know the rhythm. And if you (momentarily) lose your place, just get back into rhythm. (If you are performing with others use their rhythm to find your place.)

#3 If you fail. Big deal. Your mind is just controlling you to be perfect. No one is perfect. All you and I can do is our best. Tell your mind that "you are cool!" You will survive. The sun will come up tomorrow. And you will have done a fine job.

#4 If you know where you are going to perform, go out early and walk the stage, so to speak. Yell! Sit or lie on the floor. Sometimes just by practicing in the spot you will perform will put you at ease.
And then sit out in the audience and take in the feeling of what they see or how uncomfortable/comfortable their seats are.

#5 *IMPORTANT*


Breathing: Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. Be aware of your breathing. It will put your body in sync. Do this often. It will really calm you.
#6 Close your eyes and focus! Here is a quick exercise. Close your eyes and picture 2 mountains. Between the mountains is an ocean. Is the ocean rough or calm? If it is wavy or rough make the water and waves glassy smooth and calm by focusing your breathing. By doing this, you have actually calmed down your own subconscious' anxiousness and have gotten your focus on track.

#7. Also, just imagine, in your mind, how you will be performing and presenting. Over and over. Winning swimmers and runners see themselves playing out the entire race in their head beforehand. You too can imagine your presentation and see yourself doing well.

Remember! These 'fear' and 'stage fright' moments are all just in your head. They can be overcome through practice and by these steps:


1. Focus


2. Breathing


3. Visualization


4. And the Realization that you have the talent, resolve, spirit and enthusiasm to perform and do well.

Applying Law Of Attraction To Create Wealth

Universal Laws govern the Universe. They are basic principles of life and have been around since Creation. They are laws of the Divine Universe. Universal Laws apply to everyone, everywhere. They cannot be changed or broken. This universal law is working in your life right now, whether you are aware of it or not. You are attracting the people, situations, jobs and much more into your life. Once you are aware of this law and how it works, you can start to use it to deliberately attract what you want into your life. In using the Law of Attraction, there are several steps that can be taken to get you whatever it is that you want.

Step One
Where are you now?

Being honest and clear with where you are now is the first thing you must do. Do not make it a bad thing, even though you are not where you want to be. Recognize "This is where I am, and I'm the one that got me here, and I have to get me out of here." Don't criticize yourself for things that have happened to you. You have to keep in mind that if you got yourself into the situation you are in now, you can also get yourself out of it.

Step Two

Where do you want to be?

Decide where you want to be, whether it is starting a business, making a lot of money, or something similar. Be very clear in what it is you want to be, write it down; do not just keep it in your head. When you write it down, keep it clear, if you want an online business where you can wake up and check your email to see ten sales of a hundred dollar product, and that is what you see yourself doing then you have to write that down, write down all the aspects of what you want.

Step Three

Learn to use your tools.

There are multiple things to do in this step, but one tool to use is visualization, taking the time to close your eyes and see the one thing that you what, and believing that you are where you want to be for at least a few minutes a day. Bob Proctor brings up an idea of mental money, and this is what he refers to. If you believe you have money, then you will. Therefore, step three is about using the tools of Laws of Attraction to bring that thing to you. Reading and researching the methods that Bob Proctor has written about and teaches will be very beneficial here.

Step Four

Start to take action.

Starting to take action, look for coincidences or those people who show up in your life that came out of nowhere, is what you have to do to continue your journey through Law of Attraction. You will get a feeling, it will jump out at you, when you meet someone or something that will move you closer to your goal. Don't question these feelings. This is the universe delivering what you asked for, It is rearranging itself to bring you what you want for your life.

Step Five

Find yourself a mentor.

Go find someone who has done what it is you're doing, and form a coaching bond with them, because that's one of the easiest ways to get to where you are trying to go. In fact, Bob Proctor offers a training course for a few lucky internet entrepreneurs that get to study under him for a year. This might be the best way to receive that coaching bond that is beneficial to success.

Step Six

Start your transition slowly.

Taking baby steps is the key to Law of Attraction. Recognize that the journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step. You won't be able to plunge yourself headfirst into achieving all of your big dreams, because your mind won't have the ability to believe it when you start out. If you're ready to make a change, tired of living this mediocre lifestyle, and you're ready to take it to the next level, remember, there's many other steps that you can take, visualizing what you want, finding a coach, those are things you can do that are going to get you to where you are trying to go.

Step Seven

Succeed!

Following these steps will put you on your way to becoming a wealthy, happy individual. Using these techniques, as well as others taught by men like Bob Proctor, you would amass tremendous wealth in a very short amount of time. If you want to become rich, powerful, and happy, than this article is only the beginning. Start your journey into the Law of Attraction properly, and find aides to help you along your way.

5 Easy Steps for Energy Space Clearing

There are times that a space clearing is necessary within your living space. It could be after a break-up or divorce; it could also be after the visit of unwelcome or disturbing company.
Whatever the reason, it is important to pay attention to the energy within your home. If it feels as though you can't breathe or something about the room just doesn't feel right, then it is time to cleanse the energy of the home.

It is also a very good idea to do a space clearing once a season. It is especially needed after winter, when the doors and windows have been closed for most if not all of the season. The energy in the rooms can become stagnant and you may find things in your life feel the same.

It is also important to do a space clearing when you purchase something for the home, before introducing it into the home, such as a permanent item of fixture. It is equally important to sage the item using wild sage – not the kind used for cooking – gently light the tip of the dried plant and let the smoke waft over and around the item to be placed in the home) before it enters the home.
We all know that everything has energy and as is its nature, energy needs to move about. Energy is constantly changing; it moves into and out of form. This is how it maintains its balance.

So we need to balance the energy of our space within our own home to ensure that we keep the good energy flowing and moving.

Here are the 5 easy steps for space clearing to ensure you keep the good energy flowing.


1. Light a white candle encased in a jar to allow it to stay lit until it burns out naturally.

2. During the late morning hours open all the windows in the home. Allow the breeze to penetrate the home space.

3. Use a brass bell or Pythagorean lyre a lyre or bells tuned in a precise way) and walk around ringing or chiming. Make sure to get all the corners closets.

4. Burn white sage or organic sandal wood incense in the middle of each room.

5. Mentally chant this Sanskrit mantra "Om gum Ganapatayei Namaha" this particular mantra is used to remove blockages, it means literally "I remove all blockages which I may be feeling, mental, physical or emotional".

Conclude your space clearing ritual by saying a mental thank you and begin to close the windows in each room. Then sit in silence with your eyes closed and feel the vibration of good energy. Visualize a harmonious atmosphere within your home – and then you're done!

Blessings of Expressing Gratitude

"You must learn to understand the secret of gratitude. It is more than just so-called virtue. It is revealed to you as a mysterious law of existence. In obedience to it we have to fulfill our destiny." ~ Albert Schweitzer

How are we blessed when we express gratitude? How can we experience for ourselves the transformative value of this "mysterious law" that Albert Schweitzer mentioned?

First, we must realize that the law of gratitude, although it might seem mysterious, is not mystical or mysterious at all. It is very simple and a much more rational choice than our conditioned ways of thinking.

Over the years, I have suggested to hundreds of clients that they begin their work by expressing gratitude for everything they have as well as for the accomplishment of their desired goals. I am after a shift in perspective--from a mindset of scarcity and doubt to one of abundance and faith. That is, to encourage movement beyond thought forms which prevent taking action or produce unconstructive behaviors.

When individuals developed the habit of expressing gratitude and developed authentic feelings of thankfulness, faith and enthusiasm followed as natural "icings on the cake". Self-esteem and creativity began spiking upward. The habit of expressing gratitude came
first, then the feelings, then new actions, then the desired results.

This process is transformative. Our dominant thoughts will always generate actions that manifest those thoughts. The key is actions--nothing mysterious; although we might be amazed at how we begin acting differently. This is how the Creator designed our thoughts to affect our behavior, and our behavior to affect what happens to us in this life.

There are two choices we always have...

We can manifest negativity by spending time each day resisting how things are, thinking of how we don't have this or that, or talking about what we don't like and what isn't working. This choice is a sure-fire path to sustained misery.

There is a more functional and rational choice. If there are unfavorable circumstances, do not deny them; however, do not build walls of resistance around them. These walls will only keep them in place. Rather, observe them without judgment. Give thanks for everything. Look for blessings hidden in the turn of every season of life, the lessons of gold and treasures you would not have found otherwise.

Move above your life situation, expressing gratitude for each blessing you have now and all those yet to come. You will be thinking in harmony with your creative spirit; your actions will bring you closer to your desired goals.

The more passionately we express gratitude, the more reasons we will find for joy and new blessings to enter our lives; we will notice them and accept them. Your personal expressions of gratitude, your feelings, and your actions will bring you the peace of mind and achievements that you want.

Wishing you blessings and success,

Steve Brunkhorst

An Awesome Leadership Strategy for Developing Human Capital!

Can you tell me how you unravel the secrets behind the transformational magic of highly effective leaders?

When I hear questions like these being asked about leadership, then I know there is still a bunch more work needed to be done:

1) Who should leaders lead?

2) What precisely are leaders actually supposed to be doing?

3) How should a group leader appear to be taking the lead?

Maybe you will use this article in learning how discerning leaders evaluate, define and perform their most imperative job - that is, to boost the competences of their group's human capital.

It is my earnest wish you will appreciate this single essential truth: excelling at leadership means investing in and increasing the value of your "human capital equation".

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Human Capital Asset Enrichment Strategy:

Focus the Awesome Impacts of Our Capital Assets!

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When you are focusing your attention on, sharpening your oversight of and magnifying the impacts for each of the four workplace-expanding areas of: Production, Knowledge, Social Capital and Utilization, you will certainly enjoy an inexhaustible treasure trove of positive outcomes.

However what other target areas might deliver even larger, more sustainable pay-offs if you concentrate your efforts on developing them?

Here are some ways your leadership efforts can help others produce mutually-beneficial results:

Value - you will increase the impact of this desirable benefit simply by constantly questioning the meaning of your group's work engagements - are we doing this task to add value or because we have always done it or because we are supposed to do it this way?

Quality - improving the quality of the processes that your group uses to accomplish its work must be a continual process unto itself - how much and in what ways do we leverage the 4 areas to enhance our efficiency, improve our resourcefulness and increase our effectiveness?

Motives - what inspires you is many times just as important as what your motivation inspires you to achieve - does your group invest any of their time and energies into exploring the values, beliefs, meanings, purposes and objectives propelling their daily efforts?

Capacity - building upon the competencies, performances, know-how and knowledge, facts and figures and growth opportunities are critical in these days of disruptive, brutally dynamic, break-neck pace of change - how do you develop the capacity or potential for innovating each of those critical 4 areas?

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Whether you are called a leader or think of yourself as just a follower you can enrich the human capital assets of the people within your operating circle.

If you work at creating or organizing knowledge, performing customer or supplier services or supervising the activities of people, you too can apply the lessons you have learned in this article.

Now that you understand the strategies of human capital appreciation, I would suggest you follow these guidelines:

First, test them out in your own activities;

Next, try these principles on your friends, families and associates at work;

Finally, master these techniques and make our world a precious treasure by enriching the space around you and your colleagues, today.

Jesus Christ wisely pointed out the easiest way to guage a person's performance - he said: "You shall know them by their fruits!"

I implore you to apply this enrichment strategy and transform your knowledge into tangible actions which express your vision and become a glorious reality in your own career.

You don't need a badge to act like a leader. Follow the sage advice of that famous advertisement which urges us to: "Just Do It!"

Copyright © 2007, Mustard Seed Investments Inc., All rights reserved.

The Upper Crust

I was driving home the other day, and I heard a song on the radio that took me back a few years. It was a song by the group Outkast, entitled "Hey Ya." I was transported to a New Years Eve party in Los Angeles, back in 2002 or '03. Outkast was performing this song on one of the New Years Eve specials that aired that night on television. At that time in my life, I was a Marketing and PR Consultant to a cosmetic surgeon in Beverly Hills who also happened to be a good friend of mine. We were both single then and, in our determination not to spend the holiday alone, we agreed to go to his sister's party together (who happened to be a district attorney in the hard-core gangs unit in Los Angeles). We truly were just friends, so I saw this as a fantastic opportunity to step outside of my usual circle and meet some new and interesting people.

As the song played on the radio, I couldn't help but reminisce a little. 'That evening had been fun,' I thought as I smiled, remembering the details. My friend's sister danced to this very song in front of her television, while the band performed it from New York. She and her fiance were adorable, as she swung her hips and they tried to do the twist - so happy and carefree. I can't even begin to elaborate on the social metaphors that were being shattered in this one instance. Not only would some think it ludicrous to derive any sort of evidence to support this essay on the Upper Crust of society from Outkast or any one of their songs (being a musical group who by all accounts has tried very hard to squelch or stave off any and all references to their undeniable cuteness, or teeny-bopper appeal, and command respect, appearing edgy or at the very least, intelligent, sexual and contemporary in the hip-hop world) but the very fact that this cute little upper-class, white-bread couple became giddy on hearing the song, and ran to the front of the room to swing to it is priceless, to say the least.

It proves that social mores are suspect, at minimum. Dammit, white people can enjoy hip-hop just like the next guy, whether he or she be a "brother" or a "sister." Suffice it to say that were this same scenario played out in the hood, these cute white folks would be lucky to get out alive. It's just not okay, in the minds of many purveyors of all that is the "hood" for white people with money to enjoy this music. They just can't understand the plight of the black man, or the underprivileged. Not that the lyrics "Uh, thank god for mom and dad for sticking through together 'cause we don't know hooowww... UH!" conjure up any sort of "power to the underprivileged," but they are performed by two guys who came from nothing, so to speak, and now have a voice, albeit a fun, feel-good sort of voice. But I digress.

The party consisted mostly of attorneys - coworkers of the host and hostess - and most were there with dates or as very well-established couples. Despite my obvious unattached state, I was able to meander comfortably, striking up conversation here and there. There were some interesting people at the party. That's when I met Devin (I've changed his name to spare him the embarrassment). A very attractive man, also a coworker of the hostess.

Initially, Devin was interesting to talk to, and had lots going for him (from my point of view). He was nice looking, with large, dark, penetrating eyes, dark black hair, and what appeared to be a nice body - which was only solidified (no pun intended) when he spoke of his exercise regimen. He seemed attentive to my needs at first, assuring I had a drink whenever I wanted one, and was certainly intelligent.

I have a mind for marketing and public relations, and can rarely expel this from my psyche in social interactions. As a result, I am truly intrigued by what others do for a living, always interested to learn more, and apply this knowledge to what I do. I've found, however, that my genuine interest is sometimes misinterpreted for simplistic adoration. I've also found that this seeming adoration is extremely appealing to self-absorbed types. Like Devin.

The truth is, Devin was very successful. He too was a district attorney, set for the fast track of wealth and success in the legal realm... not necessarily astronomical wealth, but this guy would never suffer financially if he played his cards right. Normally, this is a huge turn-on for me. Not the money part (because that is always there), but the success part. There is nothing more appealing than someone who loves what they do, is good at it, and has managed to find a way to be successful doing it. Any other time, I might look past a self-absorbed conversation in someone like this, acknowledging (or excusing?) that the wiles of alcohol had once again victimized an otherwise kind, giving and interesting individual. I'd sometimes even insist the person should be given another shot (no pun intended here either).

What doomed this situation from moving forward, alleviating any chance at a second meeting, was the fact that Devin, although successful, was far too self-deprecating, and excessively negative. He was newly divorced and spoke of his ex-wife negatively. He seemed to long for pity for his sad situation. I found myself asking the shameful questions, "Was it cultural? Are all Jewish men like this?" I'd been involved with my share of Jewish men, and found it hard to determine any definitive answer in that moment.

It wasn't just the whiney, negative tones that were a turn-off. It was the notion that someone who had such potential would limit themselves so severely. In my mind, there should be no limits to someone with such an education and career. Devin was virtually cutting himself off from the enjoyment available from life. Why would someone with so much promise and opportunity waste as much time and energy on negative thoughts and expressions? I found myself thinking in terms of the marketing and public relations aspects of our potential relationship. Who knows where this guy might end up? He has the potential to write a book about his experiences in the hard core gangs unit. He could be an expert on CNN. But I knew the truth. This guy may never reach his potential, because of his whiney, negative approach to life.

I suddenly realized this was no small "if only." When someone allows such negativity and limits into their lives, they tend to end up devoting energy to maintaining the status quo. Change is scary to most people. I realized that Devin would be "happy" to maintain his life the way it is - a life content to attract attention for sad or unfortunate circumstances... for his lack of ability to be complete on his own, or to be at peace in his own skin. It's the same in children who get attention by getting in trouble at home and at school, simply because mom and dad are too busy to pay attention otherwise. Or the dysfunctional families who continue to allow abuse, because it's what they know. Not that Devin's life would be all that horrible, but sadly, in that evening, I surmised all of this from his negative behavior. I determined rather quickly that I wanted to soar with eagles, and not be pulled down by negativity or a lifetime of "I can'ts."

The quandary was that Devin didn't actually say things in an outright negative tone. I'd seen this many times before in others before him. He was the type I could imagine, who would say to me in a romantic gesture, "Let's go to New York and live it up for your birthday. We'll see whatever show you want, go to some nice dinners, maybe do a little shopping..." then he would proceed to lament over the cost of doing so, and toil over getting the cheapest rates for everything - so much so, that the trip would become burdensome, and the whole dreadful situation would eradicate any joy I might derive from such a gesture. Or, I could envision him, upon encouragement from other enthusiasts like myself, reaching for new heights in his career, all the while sickening everyone around him with worry and whining behind the scenes about the absurdity of the pursuit, or about the faults of the others he was competing with in this new venture.

I admit, it seems rather short-sighted to determine whether a person is an asset to your life that bears inclusion, or whether they should be relegated to the fringes based on a single meeting, no matter how negative. My only defense in this matter comes from my experience with divorce as a thirty-five year old single mother, and the incredible failure something like that emits on the persona. I determined back then, with great resolve, that I would no longer spend time on foolish pursuits. I decided that in order to reach my personal goals and achieve what I determined as success and happiness, I could only do so by surrounding myself with positive, successful and intelligent people. People who. like me, would not allow limits or obstacles to overcome them. I also realized that I could no longer sell myself out to needy people who would, given the chance, suck the life-blood out of me. I decided that to continue down paths that I knew up front were counter-productive to my own personal goals or dead-ends for me, would be the equivalent of behaving in pure insanity. Again I digress.

I am now brought full circle to the core of my treatise: Just who are the Upper Crust in our society? What separates the Upper Crust from Lacklusters? What makes one person capitalize on the opportunities that lie before them, and live life to the fullest, while others shy away from and disregard opportunities as too risky or faulty? The Upper Crust are not necessarily the ueber-wealthy in our midst - though, the wealthy can certainly qualify. The Upper Crust is made up of individuals who see no limits to what they can participate in or achieve in life. They take life by the shoulders and shake out of it what they desire... never allowing naysayers to dissuade or sabotage them.

The true Upper Crust rise ABOVE the norms, and above society. They MAKE things happen, and provide opportunities along the way for others. They are winners. They live where they want to live, do what they enjoy, and make time for life's wondrous dance. They are the essence of positive thought in motion. These folks would no more guffaw at the prospect of owning their own personal jet, than they would at completing a simple day's work. The two possibilities are equally within reach, should either be a goal or priority to their master.

That's just it! The true Upper Crust in our society are MASTERS of POSSIBILITY. And all for the greater good of enjoying life. Totally.

So, you may ask, whatever happened with Devin? Unfortunately, my epiphany over his lackluster status came after we'd exchanged cell phone numbers. The entire night, into the wee hours of the morning on New Years Day, I was subject to whiney, pleading phone calls. Devin, to my own surprise inundated me with queries as to why I was unable to drop everything and do things at his uncertain and undecided whims. Sadly, I was forced to seek the aid of my friends, who reiterated my lack of interest, and strongly suggested he give it up. That, my friends, is what he did. Thankfully.

Transform Your Life By Using A New Scientifically Proven Technology

The brain consists of billions of brain cells known as neurons. These neurons "talk to each other" using electrical signals. The resulting electrical activity caused by all the neurons sending signals to each other is commonly referred to as a "brainwave pattern" since it looks like a wave.

Scientists have discovered that the different brainwave patterns correspond to different mental states. For example, the brainwave patterns of an excited person will be different from those of a calm person. Likewise, the brainwave patterns of a person with a specific health problem such as high blood pressure, will be different than those of a healthy person not experiencing such a condition.

Furthermore, research has proven that a person's brainwave patterns can be changed from one state to another. By producing the desired brainwave frequencies, a person's emotional and mental state can therefore be influenced. You can induce a calm state. You can induce an excited state.

So how exactly is this done? This is where the principle of "entrainment" comes in. Entrainment in physics terms is where electrical systems and cycles "synchronize" naturally with each other to run more efficiently. As an example, if you were to place two pendulums side by side, both swinging randomly, you will notice that by the end of the day, they will both swing exactly the same way and at the same frequency.

While entrainment has for years been used in astronomy, physics, chemistry, and other electrical processes, the most exciting breakthrough yet is its application to the brain - brainwave patterns can be altered.

It is now known that many of our brain's electrical systems work the exact same way as in the pendulum example given above. You will notice that when you spend many hours in the same room with a certain individual, your brainwave patterns become similar to the other person's and your thoughts and behaviours start to match each other. This is a very common example of one brain being "entrained" by another that is nearby. There are many more examples of this in our everyday lives, but the important thing is that "entrainment" is a powerful force that has the ability to not only affect your behaviour, but also your physical body as well.

One way of doing this is by using sound. When the brain "hears" a consistent and repeating sound pattern, it automatically "synchronizes" or "entrains" its electrical patterns to match the sound that it's hearing. In this way, we are able to effectively alter a person's brainwave pattern and "state" by choosing the "sounds" that the brain hears. This discovery truly is an important breakthrough and one that will forever change the way many current problems are approached.

And that is Mind Optimization Science 101 :-)

Thoughts To Ponder - #113

James Twyman is one of the world's leaders in bringing peace to the earth. Twyman received his Bachelors degree from Loyola University in 1984, and a Doctorate in ministry from Agape Seminary in 1997. He has written five books, Emissary of Light", "Emissary of Love - The Psychic Children Speak to the World", "Proposing Tree: A Love Story", and "Prayer of St. Francis." One role James has played since the beginning, the role he considers to be his central and most important character: The Peace Troubadour.

"We are all learning to live in a way that reflects what we believe, and probably making a few mistakes along the way.

"Still, … keep preparing to step into the Light. I know that is your goal, and it is mine as well. In this we are the same."

"This is a very crucial time in the evolution of humanity toward a much higher consciousness, and some teachings will support that progress while others will not."

"My goal is to help you understand what is "really" happening, the long energetic history that is just now being revealed. Then we will have the power to change things from the source, and the world itself will change."

"Peace is not just a dream but a vibrant reality that exists within each one of us..."

"Nonviolence is the answer for the questions of our time. Love will conquer evil every time."

November 13, 1998, newspaper headlines declared that negotiations with Saddam Hussein had been broken off. The United States was about to attack at any moment. James Twyman, Gregg Braden, and Doreen Virtue were together at a conference in Florida where they had already scheduled a worldwide peace vigil for later that day. Called, "There's Nothing to Fear," again millions of people joined to simultaneously pray for world peace.

"Little did we know," says James, "that on the same day we were holding the worldwide prayer vigil, President Clinton had given the order to attack. Planes were in the air waiting for the order to go ahead and begin the bombing. Within hours of the vigil, Bill Clinton gave an unprecedented stand down order, calling the planes back, not once, but twice. As far as I know, this has never occurred with an executive order."

Self Improvement – The Human Design Solution

Desire to Change

If you stop and look around at how much material is available for self improvement, you can't help but realize that a lot of people want to be better. This is because, as humans, we have an innate and very powerful desire to change.

Many of us aren't content to just be because we have this underlying sense that there is more to life than what we are experiencing.

New Systems

Life is getting more complex, more competitive and more diverse. In the past, belief systems were the glue that held us together. Today those belief systems are losing some of their strength. We live in a new world that requires new systems. We need systems that will help us change so we can move with greater freedom. We need systems that will empower us to succeed in navigating new levels of complexity so we can meet new challenges with calm confidence.

In order to do that we need to be very clear about our own uniqueness and especially about how we are designed to interact with others.

Becoming

Fortunately humans are designed to be able to do that. We have the innate capacity to "become". Becoming is an active process of discovery. In a sense it means to "actively participate in your own ongoing creation".

What we have to learn is how to "become", as a process, not as a goal.

Self Awareness

Self awareness is an important step in the process because it slows down your reaction to the world providing you with a chance to be conscious. In the language of self transformation, to be conscious is to act with the knowledge that you know that you are acting.

When we are conscious we have a tiny window of opportunity where we can behave differently than we usually do. On the physical level of our neurology we literally have the ability to stop our own behavior and make a substitution.

Manifest Change

This little window doesn't stay open for very long which means that when you recognize it you have to be able to act very quickly, because you don't have time to try and decide which behavior you want to substitute. And, if you want truly to change, you have to be able to act differently, to substitute a different behavior.

No amount of thinking is going to bring about any actual change. You must act in order to change.

Right Now

I'm talking here about acting right in the heat of the moment, in the very heart of the now, where everything moves along so very quickly. We rarely have the luxury of pondering what we are going to do in the now, we just do. So we have to be prepared with some idea in mind of what the substitute behavior is going to be.

We have to have in mind what we are becoming. The easiest way to do this is to discover your own individual design and align with it.

Yourself

I look around and I see that there are lots of people telling us what we want to become and usually they are saying we should become like them. OK, fair enough, maybe we should. But then again maybe I should live my own design and become myself and you should live your own design and become yourself.

It's been my experience that it's more satisfying to be myself then it is to be somebody else. I'd rather make my mistakes than yours.

Discovery

In the past it's generally been a long, slow and difficult endeavor to discover yourself sufficiently well enough to really participate in your own processes. We are, after all, very complex and there's a lot to sift through to determine what is ours and what isn't.

However, like everything else in our world this too has changed in the past 20 years. Today we can tap into our individual design very quickly.

Beyond Vacations - Retreats Provide Benefits You Take Back to Your Everyday Life

A retreat can rejuvenate, enhance, and provide personal benefits way beyond a vacation. The whole idea behind a retreat is to set aside time for thought and reflection, learning or study, creativity and imagination, inspiration, and, rest and relaxation. The general focus of a retreat is some form of self improvement, in a setting that is peaceful and inspiring. If you haven't considered a retreat for your next vacation, here are some ideas to consider.

Spiritual and Religious Retreats

There are countless flavors of spiritual and religious retreats. If you belong to a church, you may already know about retreats associated with your religion and their value. But there are also many retreats based on spiritual beliefs and understandings that are not entirely associated with a particular religion.

How about a spiritual retreat that revolves around traveling to ancient sacred and spiritual sites? These trips blend education along with meditation, personal reflection, and the camaraderie of your group. Then there are spiritual retreats that focus more specifically on Buddha meditation, both for those that know nothing about meditation, as well as those who have been practicing it most of their lives. And, there are retreats that look at spirituality and enlightenment as a whole, drawing on all religions, ancient cultures and science. There are so many types of spiritual retreats that you are sure to fine something that will be both educational and enlightening.

Couples and Marriage Retreats

Retreats designed to help improve your relationship with your spouse or partner varies tremendously. An intimacy retreat can be for couples who already have a loving and committed relationship, yet would like to enhance their love life, and have a romantic vacation away from the kids. Other couples retreats are custom tailored to your needs, whether your marriage itself is in trouble, or is just a little shaky.

Couples retreats can be primarily in a group setting, solely interacting with personal coaches, or any combination of the two. They can be at an exotic destination, or closer to home. Whatever your situation, a couples retreat could be the most romantic vacation of your life, or actually save your marriage.

Health and Fitness Retreats

Yoga is certainly one of the most popular types of health related retreats. A yoga retreat could simply offer a daily yoga class along with other natural activities and exercise, including walks and hikes, boats rides, whale watching, and local tours. Or, it could be a retreat that combines yoga with spa treatments, including massage, a mud bath, sauna and hot tubs.

Other health retreats focus more on other forms of exercise, such as Pilates and stretching, and include more about nutrition and natural foods along with nature walks and perhaps journaling. But health and healing retreats can even go further and include things like natural herb cleansing drinks, body pH balancing, mineral baths and therapy to address emotional issues. The idea is to rid both your mind and body of impurities.

Then there are the numerous types of weight loss retreats. Some differentiate themselves from "fat farms" as they address body cleansing, and body and mind connections. Some integrate more spa activities while others consider themselves as more of a "boot camp". And still others focus more on non-class activities, such as walking, hiking, and various ways of just being physically active.

Hobby Retreats

A hobby retreat is basically any vacation that revolves around your interests. Surprisingly, scrapbook retreats and quilting retreats are among the most popular hobby retreats of all. As you would expect, these really are women's retreats. The idea is to join a bunch of other ladies sharing a common hobby for a time of fellowship, great food, and a diversion away from day to day life.

Artist retreats and writing retreats are also very popular. They are often found where there is a great deal of natural beauty, such as a country estate or an exotic destination. Artist retreats will also combine other activities, such as hiking to a particular place that offers inspiration, along with local sight seeing, spa activities, and meditation. Or, how about an art or writing retreat based on a cruise where you visit several ports? There are so many great ways to become inspired.

Whatever kind of retreat you may consider, think of a retreat as a fun way to enhance your life. Think of it as being something that you personally enjoy, something you would not normally do, or a fun way to improve your quality of life. Think of a retreat as an experience beyond a normal vacation. Then stop thinking and go ahead and give it a try!

The Most Important Relationship Skill Is Not Communication

The single most important relationship skill is not communication, it's taking ownership.

Successful relationships require taking ownership of your "experience."

WHAT IS YOUR "EXPERIENCE?"

Your "experience" is what happens inside your body and your mind in response to events. It is composed of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations.

Your experience is involuntary, it just "happens." It's neither good or bad or right or wrong. Your experience is always OK and valid.

YOUR THOUGHTS

We spend a lot of time in our head listening to our thoughts. Sometimes thoughts just pop into our consciousness automatically, and sometimes we direct our thoughts with intentionality to solve a problem, express ourselves, make a decision, etc.

And some of our thoughts are judgments. A "judgment" is making a meaning or interpretation in response to an event (right, wrong, good, bad, theory, explanation, reasoning, logic, etc).

FACTS VS. JUDGMENTS

You and a friend go for a walk. You say "It's a beautiful day."

Your friend responds "No, it sucks."

Your reaction is to be surprised. You can't imagine how anyone could experience such a warm, sunny day to "suck." Your impulse might be to argue with them- "Are you kidding? Look at that clear blue sky. It's a gorgeous day!"

This is a very small example of a huge dynamic that creates more relationship conflict than anything else you can imagine.

So let's take a look at this. You observe the following facts:

The sky is blue

The temperature is 76 degrees

You are walking in a park

Facts are typically measureable events and can be observed through a video camera. If you poll 100 people about a fact, such as "Is the sky blue?" you will typically get almost unanimous agreement that it is blue (except from the color blind!). If you poll 100 people and ask "Is the sky pretty?", you are asking for an opinion or judgment and will typically get less than 100% agreement.

Your experience of the day is positive. You interpret the blue sky as "beautiful," the temperature as "perfect" and "comfortable," and your body "feels good" to get exercise by walking. These are meanings you've created from your experience of the facts or events.

Your friend's experience is negative. We don't know why yet, but there are many reasons why they might judge the day to "suck."

YOU HAVE A CHOICE

In the above example, you have a critically important choice to make in your response to your difference of opinion about the day-

Option 1: Focus on the difference (e.g. "Are you crazy? Look at that blue sky and tell me it's not a beautiful day!")

Option 2: Focus on curiousity, compassion (e.g. "What's going on for you?")

The unconscious knee-jerk response is often to focus on the difference in our experiences and judgments. This choice discounts and argues with any point of view that doesn't mirror ours and leads to conflict.

It requires a conscious choice to accept differences and not impose our own experience and judgments on others. To come from a place of curiosity about and compassion for a human being who we care about who thinks and feels differently from ourselves.

THE IMPORTANCE OF OWNERSHIP

It is not someone else's fault that you are thinking or feeling something good, bad, or indifferent. It is coming completely from inside you.

The principle of ownership can be hard to grasp when our partner provides the trigger for how we feel and react, but the fact is that while our experience is involuntary, we do have complete choice over the meanings we create and the actions we take.

Behavior follows patterns. Nothing ever happens just once. If you don't strive to take complete ownership of your thoughts, feelings, and judgments, you will follow a pattern of blaming others, playing victim, and your life and relationships will suffer.

HOW TO TAKE OWNERSHIP- A FOUR-STEP PARADIGM

I have found that the easiest way to take ownership of your experience in a relationship is to keep in mind the triad of Facts, Judgments, and Feelings-

Facts- usually a measureable event ("the sky is blue")

Judgments- the meaning we make of the event ("the blue sky is pretty")

Feelings- our emotions and sensations (warm, cold, happy, sad, etc)

Oftentimes, what we human beings do, especially when we're upset or excited, is we make judgments about something and try to make that be the fact.

"You make me so angry."

"You're a jerk."

"I love you."

"War is hell."

"Ice cream is good."

These are all judgments you might feel so strongly about you believe them to be true. While they might be your personal truth at the time, they are not facts, no matter how strongly you believe them to be true.

It all starts with an event or stimulus. Something happens that gives us a certain experience.

Then, we react to our experience by making meaning of it and forming judgments.

Then, our judgments stimulate our emotions- mad, sad, glad, fear, shame.

And this all happens in the blink of an eye.

We can then react consciously or unconsciously. If we react unconsciously we will act out our feelings and judgments, whatever they are.

If we react consciously we will separate the facts from our feelings and judgments and then decide what meanings to make and actions to take. This begins by reviewing the facts in your head and making sure you're not mixing in judgments.

STEP ONE: REVIEW THE FACTS

"OK, the sky is blue, we're walking in the park together, the temperature is about 76 degrees, I just said "It's a beautiful day" and my friend said "No, it sucks."

STEP TWO: REVIEW YOUR JUDGMENTS

"Hmm, I believe it's a gorgeous day, walking here is wonderful, and I judge that my friend isn't getting it at all."

STEP THREE: IDENTIFY YOUR FEELINGS

"I'm glad it's such a beautiful day, sad that my friend is troubled and not enjoying it, frustrated and angry at their negativity."

STEP FOUR: MAKE A CONSCIOUS CHOICE

Once you've separated the facts from your judgments and feelings you are in a much better position to decide what to think, feel, and how to react. Notice in the above example that the judgments and feelings are mixed, which is common. If you are conscious you can choose amongst the mix of judgments and feelings that you will embrace and act upon, and which you will discard or leave alone.

In the above example you might decide to focus upon your sadness that your friend is having a bad day and choose a compassionate response, and to discard your judgment that they aren't "getting it."

THE POWER OF TAKING OWNERSHIP

It is our nature to have lots of thoughts, judgments, and feelings; some that we want to identify with, and some that we don't. It is common to confuse judgments with facts because we believe them so strongly. It is common to confuse feelings with judgments as well (e.g. "I feel like you're so wrong about that!"). It is common to have conflicting reactions, such as "You're a jerk" and "I love you" at the same time. While our experience is involuntary and overwhelmingly strong and real for us at times, as conscious beings we can pick and choose our truth and what we say and do about it.

Therefore, we are responsible for what we feel, think, say, and do. There are no victims in the conscious adult world. Taking ownership gives us power over our choices and destiny, and thus is the key to a successful and happy life and relationship.

Copyright (c) 2007 David Steele

The Triangle Of Wealth Part 2

The ability to balance all three areas of wealth is what true wealth is about. Balancing the areas of finances,
health, and relationships is much more than just having them in ones life. A relationship with someone that
makes one miserable on a daily basis is not wealth. Making tons of money by hurting, killing, and stealing
from other people is not wealth either. The ability to develop all three of these areas in both abundance and
balance is what true wealth is about. To experience life to the fullest because of these three areas is wealth,
and wealth is available to all of us as soon as we learn to focus on the important areas of wealth.

The first of the three areas of wealth is finances. This involves money, the desired material things, and
all the necessary material things such as food, shelter, and clothing. Sadly, the world works based on
a give and take system. It is based upon a monetary system of exchange. You must give something of
value to get something of value in return. The ability to take care of ones basic needs is essential before
one is able to move on to other areas of desire and want.

The area of finances talks about ones ability to provide the basic requirements for life. A shelter to
keep one warm, dry, and out of the weather. How nice ones shelter is is up to each individual and
their ability to develop a good financial mind set as apply that mind set out in the world. Finances
also takes into account food and water. We all know why food and water are important. On a basic
level of survival, humans don't need any where near as much variety in food as we have. Again, ones
ability to learn, develop, and apply a wealthy financial mind set is essential for better quality and
quantity of food and water. Finances also includes clothing. One must be protected from the
environment around them by clothing, not to mention that other people are a little turned off
by someone who walks around naked all the time.

Finances are an essential area to get under control before one is able to develop other areas
of wealth and abundance. The average person spends 1/3 of their life working. This is time that
could be spent doing more productive and enjoyable things if one were to take care of their
financial needs. Most people are not able to do this, often times living paycheck to paycheck
barely scrapping the bottom of the barrel to get by. Not only is this stressful, but it takes away
from ones ability to truly immerse oneself in life and enjoy the moments as they come by.

Finances also allow us the money and time to go out and develop our health and our relationships.
It allows us to travel and meet new people. It allows us the ability to go where others go on a regular
basis and make new friends. It also allows us to spend time with someone we care about and develop
more meaningful relationships. Not to mention the time to do so. A good balance also allows us to spend
much more time with our family, especially our children. There is no greater reward in the world than
being able to watch our children grow into amazing adults.

Finances are also important for our health. Having money allows us to eat more expensive all
natural foods. It also allows us the time to spend working out on a regular basis as well as
the equipment to do so. It also allows us to invest more money into regular appointments
with doctors, which can be quite an expensive bill at times. Developing a wealthy and abundant
financial life opens opportunities not other wise available to us in both health and relationships.
This is why it is the first on the triangle of wealth. Poor finances causes undo stress which is also
very bad for our health. The threat of losing the things you have worked hard to earn is a terrible
thought for most people. Not to mention the amount of time and stress that is required to work
a regular job and the amount of wear and tear on our body from it.

Take the time to get a good education about money and in developing a good understanding
of wealth and what it takes to create an abundance in this area. This could be a life long journey,
just as the other two areas can be. Enjoy the process, and be sure to apply the knowledge you gain
in each of the areas. Just a little bit each day will build and create amazing results in your life.

Effective Communication- Know How The Other Person Thinks?

Communication is the key to success. It is the key not only in career but more so in personal life. Many divorces and break-ups could be avoided if both the parties knew how to communicate effectively. What is effective communication? Is it the proper construction of the sentences? Proper selection of words or right framing of the arguments, what is effective communication? To make any communication effective one factor is most important. The recipient of the communication must get the message in a way so that he/she understands what you are saying. If that is not served, the whole exercise will be a mess.

Have you not known of instances when somebody claims that he gave all the information and the other person says that he/she understood something else? Have you not come across couples that complain that they can never reach a happy end in any argument and that always leads to more trouble?

One may be making great efforts to communicate but if the other person fails to get the message the effort will go in waste. That also arouses lot of frustration and anger in the person who was trying to communicate leading to more trouble. How to avoid this? Let me tell you something very simple that will avoid this.

Find out about the other persons style of listening and understanding. There are commonly two types of persons, one- auditory and second- visual. Auditory people talk more and hear the words more. Visuals will think more in terms of visuals. To an auditory person - you should say- this sounds good. To a visual person you should say - it looks good. Note the use of words- sounds and looks. Listen to the other person and find out the words used most often by that person. Are they auditory or visual words? Once you know that, use those words more and you will succeed in sending any communication to success.

Avoiding Friction In Relationships

I have seen lot of friction between intelligent people in my life. How to avoid that friction so that one need not regret afterwards?

First - look at the personality of the other person. Is it verbal, emotional or pictorial? A verbal personality loves to talk. You will hear a word such as it sounds well etc from such person. The word sound tells us about that personality. The emotional personality feels. If she/he buys a car, they will try to feel the car with touch and decide. A pictorial personality thinks in pictures. They go into vivid imagination. Once you know the personality of the other person, you have gone one step ahead.

The second step is reacting. Are you acting or reacting? Many of us react. We get easily provoked without any reason and react and lash out. That kills thinking because anger takes over.

What should be done? Listen to what the other person says. Think about it and before answering count up to 100. I am not saying-10, but 100. After that instead of giving opinion or reacting, ask. Ask what the other person means by what he/she says. that is very important. By asking you make other person feel that he/she is being heard. After you are satisfied that you have asked all- begin your suggestions. No answers. Only suggestions. Begin with words such as- suppose dear we do like this? Or suppose dear, you leave this job and do not get other

Acting in a mature and intelligent way, one can avoid lot of friction. If you find impossible to deal with a person, get away. Verbal duals give nothing but pain. Life is too short to be spent in unnecessary arguments.

MP3 Player Will Give You The Freedom From All Your Fears

There is a new proven craze going around these days about hypnosis and how it can help you to get rid of stress, lose weight, build confidence, heal grief, stop smoking and a lot more. Hypnosis has always been considered as being weird to most people. However, hypnosis has gone to a new level of actually doing it yourself from the privacy of your computer or using your MP3 player.

Instead of sitting in a therapist chair to let someone take you to another place in time, you can actually do it yourself and find some relief to whatever problems you have. You see, the mind is where everything begins and ends. Getting your mind to a place of peace and relaxation can help you to focus better.

Using the incredible power of your own mind, the advanced hypnosis downloads is said to move you gently into a deeply relaxed and powerfully focused state free from stress, where normal worries melt away and you can enjoy a state of relaxation like the deepest meditation.

It is apparent that you will absolutely love the way you feel after using the self hypnosis downloads if it makes you at peace and relaxed. This MP3 device can be used from your own home computer and you don't have to sit in a counselors office to get help. People need easy ways to listen to these hypnotic downloads so the ease of recording these downloads on your MP3 or CD, MP3 player, DVD or tapes, to listen to at work or anywhere really makes it easier and more convenient.

These hypnotic downloads are also recommended for professional hypnotherapist looking for hypnosis scripts, or want to learn hypnosis and these spoken-word online sessions are for the more advanced as well as normal users.

Music is the most soothing form of relaxation and what most people use to create a calming atmosphere. It takes away anxiety, anger, grief, bad habits, emotional problems, relationship problems and so much more. It iwll give you the relief you need to know that you have an option to solving your problems and face them head on.

Unravel your thoughts and get to a place of comfort and acceptance and clarity to make better decisions. The process is simple... to learn more, click on the name of the hypnosis download you are interested in on the list above and take it from there.

Who would think that an MP3 player or computer could be able to offer a way for someone to get help with their problems? Years ago, this would be unimaginable, but the way that our society is with technology these days, it does not surprise me to hear about hypnosis diets, hypnosis stress relief, hypnotic grief relief, hypnotic weight loss management, hypnosis to spark your relationship, hypnosis to get rid of sweet tooth, hypnosis to lessen pain, hypnosis for tension headaches, hypnosis to drift off to sleep, hypnosis to improve your golf game, hypnosis to motivate you to exercise and the list is endless.

These hypnosis downloads are said to have been carefully crafted by professional hypnotherapist educators who have proven track record of ethics and trust. If you can listen to these downloads and get the help you so desperately need to solve your immediate problems, why wouldn't you?