Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Avoiding Friction In Relationships

I have seen lot of friction between intelligent people in my life. How to avoid that friction so that one need not regret afterwards?

First - look at the personality of the other person. Is it verbal, emotional or pictorial? A verbal personality loves to talk. You will hear a word such as it sounds well etc from such person. The word sound tells us about that personality. The emotional personality feels. If she/he buys a car, they will try to feel the car with touch and decide. A pictorial personality thinks in pictures. They go into vivid imagination. Once you know the personality of the other person, you have gone one step ahead.

The second step is reacting. Are you acting or reacting? Many of us react. We get easily provoked without any reason and react and lash out. That kills thinking because anger takes over.

What should be done? Listen to what the other person says. Think about it and before answering count up to 100. I am not saying-10, but 100. After that instead of giving opinion or reacting, ask. Ask what the other person means by what he/she says. that is very important. By asking you make other person feel that he/she is being heard. After you are satisfied that you have asked all- begin your suggestions. No answers. Only suggestions. Begin with words such as- suppose dear we do like this? Or suppose dear, you leave this job and do not get other

Acting in a mature and intelligent way, one can avoid lot of friction. If you find impossible to deal with a person, get away. Verbal duals give nothing but pain. Life is too short to be spent in unnecessary arguments.

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